Tuesday, November 17, 2009

this world is his; his and hers alone

Lately I've been wanting to go somewhere new. A place where things are simple; no school work with deadlines. Maybe that's why I became obsessed with this song today. It's speaking to me.
Anyone who knows me knows that this is not a normal feeling for me. I'm a traditionalist. I like things to stay the same. I'm comfortable where I am and change scares me.
But not lately. Lately, I've been craving something new. I'm really happy with where I'm at right now; I'm feeling more confident, I'm happy, I'm where I belong, but there's a little part of me that wants to go somewhere and breathe new air.
This is part of the reason that I'm so upset that I can't study abroad. When I started college, studying abroad was something that I always wanted to do. I wanted to go somewhere huge, on my own, and become a better and more experienced person.
I realize that I can always travel overseas through my life, but I'm worried that I won't. Studying abroad is the perfect opportunity to get long-term travel out of your system before you get stuck in the grind of your career and I'm afraid that I'm missing out on that. I know that once real life starts, I'm unlikely to travel often, and that's saddens me.
My main goal as of now is to make it to Ireland while I'm still and O'Neil. That is something that is really important to me. Goals are always a good thing, right?
Oh well, I guess I have a trip to the South to look forward to. Literal midnight train to Georgia?

With all of that negativity said, I am feeling like a brand new, better version of myself lately. At the risk of sounding lame, I feel like I've got a pep in my step lately.
I'm participating actively in classes, saying hello to everyone I know on campus, becoming more independent, and generally just growing up. It's a good feeling.
I like mature Corrie.

I am counting down the days until Thanksgiving break. I can't wait to see everyone at home and eat a shit ton of good and have it be acceptable and appropriate. Best day of the year.
However, I am looking forward to another good weekend at TU before a weekend off. Last weekend was wonderful and silly and all around a great time, and I'm hoping for much of the same.

PS: How fabulous is Gladys? I wish there were still musicians like that.


1 comment:

  1. i started participating in my classes too! and it does wonders for your self-esteem! i just finally realized that most of the kids in my classes are dumb asses. so i feel good about anything i contribute.

    also: candle beer.

    ReplyDelete